My stupid stepdad
Ok, so last night my asshole uncle became my asshole stepdad. That's right, he married my mom and threw this big party. Big deal. Normally I would've been in Wittenberg, but since I came home for my dad's funeral, I suppose I had to stick around for this as well.

It's been like two months since my dad died, and wouldn't you know it, good old uncle Claudius already stepped in and took over. It just makes me sick. And both my mom and him were riling me the whole time. 'You seem so down, Hamlet! Cheer up already, everybody's looking at you. Everybody ELSE is having fun. Who's a big boy then!' Even my mom. I really don't get her sometimes.

Anyway I didn't say much to them, I was too angry and depressed. I really miss my dad, he was really a great guy. And they just seem to have forgotten all about him.

Anyway, Laertes the Jerk is off back to France again. Good thing too; he's always on my case because I got the hots for his sister.

So then I met Horatio, and he told me this freaky shit about seeing my dad yesterday in the garden. My dad who's been dead for two months, mind you. So I told him he should cut down on the shrooms, but he just kept insisting and nagging about it. He actually convinced me to go check out the garden with him tomorrow. Ah well, if I do see my dad, he might tell me how he died. They still don't know.